Thursday, November 5, 2009

Run Away!

Action Steve is fighting the malevolent mischief-maker 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo and his gang of thugs!

"Take that! And that! ... And that!" Action Steve is really in good form today as he knocks out thug after thug with his Action-lele, but 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo and his sidekick Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen are giving him much more trouble. Action Steve has managed to knock out every one of their minions, or hurt them enough that they are down for the count! The the quiet moaning of the criminals, for whom the phrase, "That'll leave a mark" more than applies, can be heard all over the parking lot.

"You guys," Action Steve takes a breath, "have been... practicing."

"That's ri--" just as 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo is about to go into another dialog he stops. Those that are still conscious can hear police sirens in the distance, coming closer.

"We should leave," Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen tells 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo.

As they run off, Action Steve's supervisor comes out of the building, "I called the police as soon as I saw them outside, but his is no good Steve, you're late again. I'll need another note from Detective Malloy or I'll have to make it an occurrence. I know you're a super hero and everything, couldn't you get some kind of book deal? or maybe you could go on the lecture circuit? I think your extra-curricular activities are putting your job in serious jeopardy."

"The customer's need my help too." Action Steve replies dramatically.

Meanwhile, in an unused warehouse and 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo's secret hide out.

"I'm sorry to hear that, no, we are not threatening our employees at this time. You may quit without fear of retribution. We reserve the right to threaten you later but frankly I don't think we'll bother. Good luck with your other criminal activities. Thank you," Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen hangs up the phone and walks out of his makeshift office. 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo is sitting at a table in the middle of the warehouse, the remaining thugs are smoking, eating pizza, chatting, and nursing their wounds.

'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo greets his sidekick, "Ah, how does your work progress Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen?"

"You know, you don't have to say my full 'villain' name at every opportunity." Louis sighs. "Would you please explain something to me?"

"Explain? I am The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo!" The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo stands up, his thugs stop what they are doing and listen, in admiration. "I do not explain myself to--"

"Why do all of your plans involve attacking Action Steve? Are there more profitable things we could be doing with our time?"

"Because. I'm. E-vil!" no one should be able to pronounce a dash, but 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo managed it. After that, pronouncing the period's and exclaimation point was a piece of cake.

"But it's not making us any money. What about starting a protection racket? Secret casino? Or at least a loan shark business?"

"Oh I see! you want to expand our operation! I like how you think my malevolent minion! There is something I have always wanted to try."

"Yes?" I really shouldn't get my hopes up, Louis thinks to himself. "We are going to take a break from attacking Action Steve and make a giant laser that will blow up the moon!" exclaims 'The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo.

Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen cradles his head in his hands.

"What?" asks the E-vil one in the tones of one who is more interested in perfecting his villain laugh than his business model.

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