The Astonishing Adventures of Action Steve! This Episode: "Action Steve, Magic Detective!"

    In our last episode The Action Alliance, Action Steve, Action Raptor, Action Pre, and the magically sentient flying car known as The Super Action Vehicle or S.A.V., were investigating the disapearance of that dangerous supervillain, The Senator, along with Detective Malloy, Hulaville's super hero liason. He was no longer a senator after having revealed that he had been working with and then killed that other dangerous supervillain, The Thrill Seeker. Action Steve now uses his spell book, given to him by his friend and fellow super hero The Mighty Pine Cone, and reveals a hole in the air. That same magical portal that The Senator used to make his escape!

    "I have to admit, grudgingly of course," says Detective Malloy, "That's pretty impressive."

    "kooooughaaaac!" agrees Action Raptor, Action Steve's best pal, who is a feathered dinosaur wearing a cap, goggles, and a scarf from his adventures in time as a pilot in World War I.

    The portal is about the size and shape of a small television screen. It's translucent, and shimmers in purple and yellow. The "screen" shows the snow of an old analog television. A shimmering purple and yellow trail emits from it and goes off down the street.

    "Okay team," says Action Steve, "Let's see where this leads." Action Steve and Action Raptor take the front seat of The Super Action Vehicle while Action Pre and Detective Malloy sit in the back. Although The Super Action Vehicle doesn't Actually have a face, you could swear it's grill is smiling as it lifts off and follows the trail over the streets and buildings of Hulaville. It finally leads to a motel.

    A family had just parked, their station wagon piled with vacation luggage, and had been walking toward the motel's front office? As The Super Action Vehicle lands a few spaces nearby in visitor parking. Two children, a young boy and young girl shriek with delight and run toward The Action Alliance, who greet them warmly.

    "Hey kids!" says Action Steve.

    "Thraaaaaawk!" greets Action Raptor.

    Action Pre, Steve, and Raptor, all sign autographs while Detective Malloy rolls his eyes. He walks off and follows the purple yellow trail to a motel door. He knocks on the door.

    "Hey anybody in there?" Malloy asks.

    No answer.

    Detective Malloy walks back to see Action Raptor being petted by the girl and the boy sitting in the driver's seat of The Super Action Vehicle while Action Steve plays the kids his theme song on his Ukulele.

    "Action Steve will save the day!
    Action Steve will save the day!
    Action Raptor too!
    Action Raptor too!
    Action Raptor too!
    We're gonna rescue you!"

    Malloy walks over to Action Pre who is standing with the children's mother and father autographing his book and cd, both titled "It's Me Action Pre!" for them. They are big fans and already had their own copies.

    Malloy whispers into Action Pre's ear, " The trail leads to a motel door. I'm gonna go get the key to the room. Meet me there when you're done."

    Action Pre nods in a serious manner and then smiles a the couple as he hands his book back, "It's always great to meet such wonderful fans. But if you'll excuse me, The Action Alliance have other plans."

The Astonishing Adventures of Action Steve! This Episode: "Is this the end of The Original Mr. Evil Elli Manalo?"

    Last episode one of the first villains to fight Action Steve, The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo, was underground in Hulaville, looking for one of the secret hatchways that Action Steve uses to fly into the city from his Secret Action Lair! The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo's second in command, Louis Lounatik Nguyen, now going by the name of Lounatic, saw this as a perfect opportunity for an ambush. With the help of The Senator, an ancient wizard who used magic to send Mr. E-vil's gang away, Lounatic has revealed that he will replace The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo with a clone under his control!

    The clone of The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo has pushed the original into a deep pit, and as The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo hangs onto the edge Lounatic points his gun at his former boss, preparing to fire! The clone and The Senator look on at The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo, grinning. The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo was grinning too, but was full of rage.

    As he struggles not to fall he says, "You better.. You better make sure I'm dead!"

    "Oh I intend too," replies Lounatic, he turns to his two compatriots. "Gentlemen, hold him." Each of the men take an arm as Lounatic points his gun into The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo's gut.

    BANG!

**************

    Action Pre, Action Raptor, Action Steve, and the newly sentient Super Action Vehicle are now at the last known location of The Senator with Detective Malloy, special liaison to Hulaville's super hero community. They were in an alley, the kind kids love to ride their bikes through. Today it was a no go. Police officers were at either end and the alley had been blocked off with police tape. The Senator doesn't hold public office anymore but people had gotten used to referring to him that way. His life as a senator came to an end when he killed the dangerous supervillain known as The Thrill Seeker. The Thrill Seeker and The Senator had been old friends or old enemies. Each of them were hundreds of years old. The Senator had killed The Thrill Seeker with magic, and the killing had been caught on video by the unregistered super hero, Pimp Racer.

    "I don't know what you three hope to find," said Detective Malloy, shaking his head."Witnesses said he opened a hole in the air and squeezed through it. They said he extended himself unnaturally, like he was made of silly putty. Then the hole and The Senator disappeared."

    "It's four of us," corrected Action Pre. "Isn't that right S.A.V.?"

    BEEEP! The Super Action Vehicle beeped happily, startling Detective Malloy.

    "Should I stop mentioning that this job continues to become weirder and weirder by the day?" asked Detective Malloy.

    "Maybe by the Minute," commented Action Steve. "Disappeared by magic did he? I think I might have something for that." Action Steve propped up his Action Ukulele against the alley wall and opened the large, old, yellowing, dusty spell book given to him by his super hero friend from another dimension, The Mighty Pine Cone.

The Astonishing Adventures of Action Steve! This Episode: "The Inevitable Double-Cross"

    We see complete darkness. We hear complete silence. Then there's a loud POP! as a manhole cover falls from the ceiling. The hole lets in a shaft of light illuminating a subway tunnel that's easily a hundred years old. Silt has been piled up on corners and edges by rivulets of water. Water drips from the ceilings. Give this place a few million years and it'd be a perfect tourist spot for spelunkers. The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo and his gang climb down from ropes. The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo wasn't wearing his normal red leather trench coat. Instead he was wearing red coveralls with flames painted on them and a few unnecessary buckles. "Well!" He says, "I think we're getting somewhere!" His gang began placing lights around the area so they can get a good look around. It was a small room with 3 walls. One large circular opening revealed a large drain pipe. The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo had a look down and whistled. It went down much farther than he could see.

    Lounatic, The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo's second in command, climbs down along with the other gang members and began inspecting the room.

    "Do you think there are mutant alligators in the sewers?" The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo asks. "It's not a proper sewer without mutant reptiles"

    "That's really the last straw for me." says an exasperated Lounatic, who pulls out his gun and points it directly at The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo.

    Mr. E-vil doesn't act surprised. "Oh Louis, what can you possibly be thinking? I've been keeping an eye on you. I know all about your operations. I know all about the banks you've been robbing. I knew you'd try to take me down but is this really your plan? We are surrounded by my own men. Some of my most loyal. And unless I'm very much mistaken you've got no one here with you!"

    "You are mistaken," said a voice from the darkness. And it was a quiet darkness.

    Wait a minute, where were his men? The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo looked around and couldn't see anyone around but the three of them. Instead of being frightened The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo was pleased. It looked like he had been taken unawares after all. The owner of the voice stepped out from the darkness. It was The Senator! The one on television who had been revealed to be at least hundreds of years old and a sorcerer! Mr. E-vil hadn't been expecting this either.

    "Don't worry about your men. They're safe." Lounatic says.

    The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo, still smiling, says "You don't think they'll follow you once I'm gone do you?"

    "Oh a piece of you will remain," replied the senator. "Say hello to your new replacement."

    Out of the shadows walks another figure. It's another Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo! A clone! The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo is now angry as this other Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo, dressed all in black, charges toward the original. The two begin to trade punches but the other Mr. E-vil has the advantage of momentum and pushes The Original Mr. E-vil into the large drain. Mr. Evil grabs the edge as he falls in and hangs on.

    Lounatic walks into The Original Mr. Evil Manalo's view. "You know that fall could probably kill a man." Lounatic idly comments as if he were commenting on the weather. "But, just to be sure." Lounatic points his gun right at Mr. E-vil.

The Astonishing Adventures of Action Steve! This Episode: "The Plan"

    Lounatic walked into the nondescript warehouse near Hula Bay that served as The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo's base of operations. The Original Mr. E-vil greeted him in a voice that nearly shook the rafters. "Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen! How are you?" the tone was somewhere between suspicion, sincerity and mockery. Lounatic knew this was a sign the man was annoyed. Lounatic didn't really care.

    "Hello Mr. E-vil. You wanted to see me?" Lounatic replied.

    "Indeed I did! I wanted to know if you had time in your busy schedule for our little plan." The words, "busy schedule" were delivered with almost pure mockery, and just a dash of suspicion. The "Our" that The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo was referring to was the rest of his gang. Lounatic knew how likely it was they had contributed to the plan. "Action Steve has been fired from his job," The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo continued, "and I'm not sure when he'll get another one. The time has, once again, come for us to search for his secret hideout."

    Not this again, thought Lounatic unhappily. He remembered the last time. It had taken months to locate just where one of the secret hatchways Action Steve used to launch from his lair in his flying car. Once one of the men found it they had inadvertently triggered an alarm. He reported that the world seemed to shimmer around them for a moment and then the hatch was sealed up. Days of investigation revealed that the hatch had been sealed with concrete, and unless they wanted to get a crew of men with heavy equipment at the site, not the sort of thing a criminal who wants to avoid attention would do, they wouldn't be able to discover where it had lead. They'd tried finding another hatchway with the same result. Only this time the men at the scene had been teleported to the Hulaville police station. It was clear Action Steve had very powerful friends. But Lounatic was still convinced the man was not a threat, and he said so.

    "Not a threat eh? You weren't able to best him in combat when last we met. We lost a lot of our gang and had to run away!"

    It was true, Action Steve was a better fighter than Lounatic, but what did that matter? Action Steve dressed in a flashy costume and he fought very obvious villains in other flashy costumes. All one had to do to avoid him was to not wear a mask! Lounatic knew there was no point in saying this. Instead he asked, "What did you have in mind sir?"

    "Our problem has been that we always look at the surface," The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo replied. "I'm betting that's where the security is strongest. Instead we need to go underground and search for unusual features. I'm betting a newly built tunnel will stick out among the old sewer drains like a sore thumb. We'll search the entire sewer, one section at a time. We won't spread out like before. We'll have our entire team down there, in each location, looking for alarms and this magical shimmering the men have talked about. We'll bring everything we need to defeat Action Steve. We'll be ready."

    Actually, it was a good plan, and perfect for Lounatic's purposes. He might even try it himself once The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo was finally of the way. Action Steve was not a threat, but he could be a nuisance. "Good idea sir," Lounatic replied. "May I help with organizing the search plan?" The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo nodded happily. Louis liked the plan. That was good. Louis was as smart as he thought he was, but, Mr. E-vil thought to himself, nowhere near as clever. No doubt his second in command, Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen, was planning to ambush him in the sewers. He remembered when he was second in command like Louis was now. It was good to have ambition, and treachery keeps the wits sharp.

The Astonishing Adventures of Action Steve! This Episode: "Daylight Robbery!"

    BOOM!

    In broad daylight, a street facing wall of First Hulaville Bank has exploded outwards! Debris has landed everywhere. Cars are covered in dust. People have been knocked down and injured. A cloud of dust fills the empty hole where the wall had been. The alarm blares on. A black car races toward and then screeches to a halt in front of the new opening. Three figures, all dressed in black, wearing black gloves and ski masks, holding very large guns and larger bags of money, erupt from the smoke and quickly get in the car. The car is already moving just as the last thief gets in.

    The Driver wears all black as well but he isn't wearing a mask. His name Louis "Lounatik" Nguyen, 2nd in command to The Original Mr. E-vil' Manalo. "Any problems?" He asks the 3. They take off their masks as the car easily races across a busy city street. They are two men and one woman.

    "None at all Louis." The woman grins.

    "Good. And I've decided I like Lounatic. Just Lounatic, nothing else. But I'll have none of that spelling things with a 'k' business. Hold on." Lounatic expertly corners into an alley at high speed and parks in an open garage. The door quickly closes. Two serious looking teenage girls in coveralls, goggles, and face masks open the doors for the bank robbers, who quickly remove their guns, bags of money and other personal effects from the car. The two girls proceed to replace the license plates and repaint the car with professional skill. The 4 criminals quickly walk into the safe house and go change. The men in one room. The woman in another. Once changed, they put their clothes in plastic bags and give them to the girls, who are nearly finished with the car.

    Lounatic looks at his watch as the woman watches him. He waits a few minutes and says, "Go." She calmly walks out the front door. There are no police. Everything is calm outside. There's a kid sitting on a curb using his skateboard as a seat. She walks behind him so there is little chance of even the kid identifying her later. Looking at the woman walking away from the safe house, no one would think that she had just robbed a bank. 10 minutes later the girls drive off in the newly painted car. They are no longer in cover alls nor does their manner suggest they are professional criminals. Instead they're dressed and acting very much like normal teenage girls. 15 minutes later another bank robber leaves. 23 minutes pass, the third robber leaves. Lounatic is all alone in the safe house, on the phone. "Have the car meet me at the street corner near the house. Be there in 10 minutes."

    We hear the "yes sir." on the other line. Lounatic made a mental note to not do this again. Robbing banks is very risky. Robbing a series of banks and getting away with it is nigh impossible. But this seemed the best way to get a lot of money in a short period of time. Now that he had it, there were safer ways to make more. There was one more thing to take care of. His boss. Louis hadn't meant to become a henchman for The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo. He had been down on his luck, and the gang had seemed like a good business opportunity. But as he began working for the gang it soon became apparent that Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo wasn't interested in making or even taking money. Everything in his life seemed to center around that fool Action Steve.

    Action Steve fought giant potatoes in a flying car using a musical instrument as a weapon. That clown wasn't a threat. He was ridiculous, and easy to avoid so long as you didn't seek him out or inadvertently dress like a tuber. But Mr. E-vil seemed obsessed. No, Action Steve was not important and The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo had to go. Lounatic hit his speed dial.

    "Louis 'Lounatik' Nguyen!", The Original Mr. E-vil Elli Manalo answered. "Where have you been?"   

There's a new Action Steve comic!

Have a look!

http://www.drunkduck.com/The_Astonishing_Adventures_of_Action_Steve/index.php?p=658140

Action Pre Biography!

Action Pre was once a microbiologist with a habit breaking into rhyme when excited or agitated. He was working on nanotechnological cybernetic amoeba's with his 3 lab assistants and his wife, when the nefarious villain, The Thrill Seeker burst in and destroyed Action Pre's research. The chaos caused by The Thrill Seeker also lead to the death of Super Dudical Steve (a Steve from another dimension) and Pre's wife. Pre decided at that moment to become a super hero! He altered his genetic make up and cybernetically enhanced himself to become a super powered super hero! His former lab assistants are his back up singers now. And although Action Pre recently lost the race to become Hulaville's mayor, he has just released a CD and an autobiography, both called "It's Me, Action Pre!" His single, "Party Paramecium" is currently at the top of the the charts.

    Action Pre was created by Parius Futch and he continues to contribute ideas for Action Pre's storyline.